5:40am, every single weekday, my alarm goes off. Right as this happens I start a sequence of events that go like this: I perform a routine of stretches, drink a full pint of water, do the restroom business, drink another pint of water, pack my bag and head out the door. Once out the door, I drive to the gym car park, get out my car, warm up and then head out on a 8-10 mile run. The only exception being Wednesday, I do everything the same except I get into the pool and swim 2 miles. Once all this is complete I do 15 minutes of Yoga and then my day is started. I don’t do this for any reason other than I find it the most effective way to manage being me.
Getting up and getting those first few hours to myself is more important to me than almost anything and I can’t stress enough how much it is a necessity that I think most people would benefit from. You don’t have to start your day with exercise though; meditation, a walk, even reading I think would set you up into a mindset that gives you the sense that the day is yours. Exercise for me is the most effective, I tend to save meditation and reading for the later hours of the day.
This past week I have been feeling a number of things I feel the need to put in writing:
Firstly, the crunching reality of the band’s final show is really starting to hit me. It was such a good show and last week I was thriving from the buzz of it, but this week I’m experiencing a come down of sorts. My senses tell me that perhaps the band ending wasn’t an outcome I really wanted from the discussion we had back at the start of this year. Perhaps it means this isn’t the end completely, but thats a decision thats not completely mine to make. We’ll see how the future pans out and whether the universe brings it back together. I guess that either way its only healthy to mourn over it for a little while.
Laura and I have been reading a book called “The anatomy of the spirit” and its had me thinking about the negative and positive energy I project on a daily basis. Mostly, my life is full of positive energy and I tend to project this into everything I do. However, just like anybody else, I project my fair share of negative energy. One area that seems to be conjuring these more negative feelings at the moment are family relationships. I must admit, I’d like to improve them but a relationship has two sides and I think that the feeling needs to be mutual within the other parties in order for that to happen. My best way of dealing with it at the moment is to try and “forgive and forget” whenever something is said or brought up. However, this is hard to do in the moment as what is said isn’t always true or fair and this evokes a reaction in me. I’m sorry I can’t give much context here but its all a bit too personal to put on the blog. I think in order for relationships to improve and for negative energy to disappear a number of things need to happen. These I’m sure will come to light in future posts so we’ll leave that here.
I have nothing but positive and excitement for 2020 and 2019 has been a very successful year. Today is the last working day before half term and upon reflection, a lot has happened over the past 6-7 weeks. One of the best being that Laura and I moved out and have our own space with big plans set in motion. Don’t take this post as me feeling negative, I guess the positives speak for themselves.
For me, it’s a great release to put my feelings into words and post them onto the internet. I hope you don’t mind reading them.
Peace and love err-body.
BG
benedict. 