When you simply don’t want to.

Ever get this over whelming urge just to pack up, get out, leave, storm out? This burning desire to just shut everything off and go far away? It’s definitely a feeling we all feel in moments. It doesn’t necessarily reflect how happy or sad you feel or how well you’re feeling mentally or physically, sometimes it can be as a reaction to an obvious stimuli and other times you might not know why you feel that way. Either way, it’s definitely a very natural and normal reaction.

Sometimes I just pretend I’m right where I was in this picture.

My go to reaction when I feel like this is to take the deepest meditative breath I can and try and bring myself into the present moment. I then try to assess if the situation I am in is really that bad or really the stimulus that is causing this feeling. Most of the time, the thought and reflection time makes me realise that even if I did just up and leave and walk out that it probably wouldn’t resolve the way I feel. Which is why I would never recommend storming out or just exiting a situation in a fashion that causes any attention or drama. If it is a situation that is so unbearable that you wish to remove yourself then you won’t feel an impulse to do it in an attention seeking manner. In fact, you’re likely to do it in the opposite way and sneak out.

I guess though, I am writing this about feeling this desire on a deeper level. Not just in a every day situation but a feeling that buries deep into your subconscious and causes you to feel a push into doing and finding something new. Maybe you’ve spent to long where you are, maybe you’ve grown weary of the company you keep or maybe its just been too long since you went on an adventure?

Am I feeling this right now? In some ways yes, in some ways no. What I am feeling is a desire to do what I feel I am capable of, to push myself, to learn and create new things. I don’t want to live a sedate life and I certainly don’t enjoy being told what I can and can’t do with my time. I guess thats what brought on me feeling like this today; I am at work and had to unexpectedly teach – which is unusual for someone who is now on their summer break. I don’t mind teaching and I’m even enjoying myself but the situation of it just being sprung upon me with no expectations threw me. This morning it meant I felt as though I should just break out and fly away.

Lucky for me though, I am going away next week. A 2 week travel around Europe with no real plan. Perfect.

Have a lovely Tuesday people.
BG

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